[ There's a new wave of anger as Jonas describes the effects of a threat he'd already seen, still no better at controlling his reactions to it. ]
You did well against him, even if you shouldn't have had to.
He wants to see his art triumph above anything else. My brother defeated him and we both refused to react to his threats. The first time I met him was when he attacked me to try to kill me, and all he said was that my eyes refused to acknowledge his art. That was enough to infuriate him.
That makes it kinda sad when you put it like that. Not that I'm sympathizing. I just know what it's like to be w/o (without) direction. At least I didn't start choking ppl over art projects.
(there's no avoiding it, is there? itachi seems cold, but he never seemed cold-blooded. how is he supposed to act now? how is sasuke moving on with all of it?)
If Itachi really did those things then maybe talking to him isn't the best idea for me even if I'm really unthreatening. idk I feel so far removed from it and it feels like such a double-standard w/ like... me being okay with you having killed people.
Most of us lose direction at some point. It doesn't cause us to commit suicide as an art piece in an attempt to murder a stranger.
[ There are a lot of things about his world he's accepted as twisted, sick, terrible, but unavoidable and normal. Deidara is firmly in the abnormal category.
But he is now officially a secondary concern when his brother is an available topic. ]
Our relationship is complicated. You may have witnessed that. [ May have. ] For my part what I can say is that he didn't want to do what he did. It hurt him, but his actions likely saved many more lives in the long-run.
When I do talk to him, I bear that in mind at all times.
He told me, others told me, and I saw his memories.
He would never harm you like that, Jonas. He despises bloodshed, and even if he didn't I would never allow it to happen. I can assure you completely of your safety.
(he despises bloodshed, but murdered his entire family? to save how many lives? was that a certain outcome? what gave him the right to decide something like that? why?
jonas raises a hand to cover his eyes a moment, though that just makes the dead faces stand out that much clearer in his mind. sasuke was so scared, shaking hard and close to tears when he'd seen him in that memory, and the only element missing was the perpetrator who committed such vile acts. if sasuke says it's okay, isn't that his decision? despite how warped it is byβjesus, he doesn't know.
all he feels is confusion, reluctance, fear, and doubt.)
I can't hang around him right now. This is so beyond me.
[ It's more than just a general fear of physical harm, and Sasuke realizes that. This is bigger than him, bigger than Itachi, and bigger than their world; there's no easy way to talk through it. It'll need time and discussion, and right now the former seems more important than the latter. Fuck, Deidara... ]
I understand. What I'm trying to explain to you took me years to confront; you should take what time you need.
I just regret that it happened this way. I should have taken you aside earlier.
It's none of my business. That's between you two. You've got the right to forgive him if that's what you wanna do, bc it's you who were affected by that the most. And no one can say shit about it.
But I will never forgive him for doing that to you.
ik the fact that we're here in Aefenglom and all entangled in each other's lives means I'll be hanging out w/ him again, whether that's next week or months from now. That's what I need time to deal w/.
[ There's no hiding his emotions from Jonas any longer even if he wishes he could, unable to disguise a mix of disappointment, displeasure, and concern. Beneath all of that is resolve, however, and it's this which shines through in what he chooses to say. ]
I can ensure for my part that I don't facilitate you being around one another when it's not needed. If you tell him directly you don't want to speak to him he'll also respect that, or I can do it for you.
[ There's no easy way to resolve an issue like this one, not when it's so inextricably linked to his very person, so undeniably twisted, and still without any pure happy ending for those involved. Why couldn't he give him a better reassurance? ]
[ He isn't sure. Seeing Naruto was difficult, coping with Itachi has become more complicated, and the residual effects of the mirrors are felt by all of them. But these are things he can manage, and not something with which he wants to muddy this conversation. ]
Will I see you this weekend? I was planning to cook.
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You did well against him, even if you shouldn't have had to.
He wants to see his art triumph above anything else. My brother defeated him and we both refused to react to his threats. The first time I met him was when he attacked me to try to kill me, and all he said was that my eyes refused to acknowledge his art. That was enough to infuriate him.
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Hey I drew this pic if you don't like it I'm going to KILL YOU????? What did you do with him, dump him in the Wilde like you said?
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At any rate, yes. I did. [ Now... there's the elephant in the room. ]
Regarding what Deidara said, I wanted to allow Itachi to speak on that himself. I wasn't trying to keep it a secret from you.
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(there's no avoiding it, is there? itachi seems cold, but he never seemed cold-blooded. how is he supposed to act now? how is sasuke moving on with all of it?)
If Itachi really did those things then maybe talking to him isn't the best idea for me even if I'm really unthreatening. idk I feel so far removed from it and it feels like such a double-standard w/ like... me being okay with you having killed people.
ig I'm curious as to how you guys still talk.
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[ There are a lot of things about his world he's accepted as twisted, sick, terrible, but unavoidable and normal. Deidara is firmly in the abnormal category.
But he is now officially a secondary concern when his brother is an available topic. ]
Our relationship is complicated. You may have witnessed that. [ May have. ] For my part what I can say is that he didn't want to do what he did. It hurt him, but his actions likely saved many more lives in the long-run.
When I do talk to him, I bear that in mind at all times.
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(the answer he receives will tell him a lot, not just about itachi but about sasuke.)
I'm just really worried.
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He would never harm you like that, Jonas. He despises bloodshed, and even if he didn't I would never allow it to happen. I can assure you completely of your safety.
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jonas raises a hand to cover his eyes a moment, though that just makes the dead faces stand out that much clearer in his mind. sasuke was so scared, shaking hard and close to tears when he'd seen him in that memory, and the only element missing was the perpetrator who committed such vile acts. if sasuke says it's okay, isn't that his decision? despite how warped it is byβjesus, he doesn't know.
all he feels is confusion, reluctance, fear, and doubt.)
I can't hang around him right now. This is so beyond me.
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I understand. What I'm trying to explain to you took me years to confront; you should take what time you need.
I just regret that it happened this way. I should have taken you aside earlier.
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But I will never forgive him for doing that to you.
ik the fact that we're here in Aefenglom and all entangled in each other's lives means I'll be hanging out w/ him again, whether that's next week or months from now. That's what I need time to deal w/.
ig that's it.
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I can ensure for my part that I don't facilitate you being around one another when it's not needed. If you tell him directly you don't want to speak to him he'll also respect that, or I can do it for you.
Is there anything else you need?
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I can do it myself.
But no, ig I don't need anything else.
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[ There's no easy way to resolve an issue like this one, not when it's so inextricably linked to his very person, so undeniably twisted, and still without any pure happy ending for those involved. Why couldn't he give him a better reassurance? ]
Do you want to think about it alone?
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Is everything else alright?
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[ He isn't sure. Seeing Naruto was difficult, coping with Itachi has become more complicated, and the residual effects of the mirrors are felt by all of them. But these are things he can manage, and not something with which he wants to muddy this conversation. ]
Will I see you this weekend? I was planning to cook.
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Yeah, sounds good to me man. Drop by anytime.
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