[ Jonas starts moving and he does little more than watch him go, aware that chasing after him would probably be counterproductive. For both of them.
And the way he speaks of his eventual fate is so plain, so casual, that it feels like a slap in the face. A wake-up call, maybe, to some degree of his own selfishness. ]
I've been feeding and taking care of myself. The full moon is when I know I'll be tested the most. [ ... he needs to be honest with him, like Jonas was in return. ]
I don't want to expose my memories and emotions to someone else. Especially not someone that matters to me.
(his pace is slow, especially after reading that. they're both just trying to look out for one another. if that wasn't obvious before, it certainly is now. they're in a better place in their friendship, but that doesn't mean there still aren't mountains to climb.
jonas thumbs the perspiration from his brow and tries again.)
If anyone could handle it it'd be you, man. I know that, but it's not gonna stop me from worrying.
Memories, emotions, all those things are super private. I'm not gonna twist your arm or try to force you into the commitment that it is....... bc it is a huge one. But I want you to know that I'm stronger than I was and I've got your back. Through whatever.
I wish I'd had the guts to bring this up in a normal way that'd actually mean smth lol
[ He feels it's time he moved, making it a point to not follow Jonas even as he begins the trek back to his own home. He owes him food, after all. ]
I wanted to believe it wasn't about my privacy and that I was better than that.
The truth is I don't want to share those things. It doesn't mean my concerns don't exist for anyone that would be subjected to them, however. And what you're saying is still meaningful, we just have big decisions ahead of us.
Your safety is still paramount. You'll have a bond before anything happens to you, you can rely on that.
(he never thought about it from that angle, surprised at the honesty of it. would it make sasuke a bad person for not wanting to share what he's been through, keeping his hardship his own? no, it wouldn't. just as jonas would never want to spread his memories, good and bad.
there's a lot to consider... but it doesn't change his mind.)
I get it. There are memories meant only for you. I have those, too. But sharing them with a stranger would be better than sharing them with a friend?
Sorry, that's what I don't understand. I don't think I want to.
Just because I said exposing my memories and emotions to someone I cared about would be more difficult doesn't mean I'd sooner choose a stranger. It means your opinions, reactions, and impact would mean more than someone else's.
An ideal situation for me is one that doesn't involve a bond at all. I'm doing my research for all of our sakes.
[ And should that fall through? Well, he already made his promises and commitments. He'll be here, regardless of his personal feelings. A choice between death and anything else right now is no choice at all. ]
I understand, but you're taking it personally when that isn't my intention. [ Words he knows are a bad idea as soon as he sends them. ]
One way or another, this will be handled. [ Plan B... Whatever Jonas is searching for as a Plan B is Sasuke's Plan A; knowing that highlights the frustration Jonas must be feeling in his eyes in that much more. Why can't they have more time? ]
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And the way he speaks of his eventual fate is so plain, so casual, that it feels like a slap in the face. A wake-up call, maybe, to some degree of his own selfishness. ]
I've been feeding and taking care of myself. The full moon is when I know I'll be tested the most. [ ... he needs to be honest with him, like Jonas was in return. ]
I don't want to expose my memories and emotions to someone else. Especially not someone that matters to me.
no subject
jonas thumbs the perspiration from his brow and tries again.)
If anyone could handle it it'd be you, man. I know that, but it's not gonna stop me from worrying.
Memories, emotions, all those things are super private. I'm not gonna twist your arm or try to force you into the commitment that it is....... bc it is a huge one. But I want you to know that I'm stronger than I was and I've got your back. Through whatever.
I wish I'd had the guts to bring this up in a normal way that'd actually mean smth lol
no subject
I wanted to believe it wasn't about my privacy and that I was better than that.
The truth is I don't want to share those things. It doesn't mean my concerns don't exist for anyone that would be subjected to them, however. And what you're saying is still meaningful, we just have big decisions ahead of us.
Your safety is still paramount. You'll have a bond before anything happens to you, you can rely on that.
no subject
there's a lot to consider... but it doesn't change his mind.)
I get it. There are memories meant only for you. I have those, too. But sharing them with a stranger would be better than sharing them with a friend?
Sorry, that's what I don't understand. I don't think I want to.
no subject
An ideal situation for me is one that doesn't involve a bond at all. I'm doing my research for all of our sakes.
[ And should that fall through? Well, he already made his promises and commitments. He'll be here, regardless of his personal feelings. A choice between death and anything else right now is no choice at all. ]
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I'm going back to the Coven, I need a plan b. So drop the leeks at the gate or smth, I'll get them later.
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One way or another, this will be handled. [ Plan B... Whatever Jonas is searching for as a Plan B is Sasuke's Plan A; knowing that highlights the frustration Jonas must be feeling in his eyes in that much more. Why can't they have more time? ]
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You guys can do whatever you want.
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I'll be by at 8 with the food.
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